It is my extreme pleasure to announce the opening of the 2008 Greg Bardsley Guacamole Season.
I know, I know. Who am I give to myself my own guacamole season? Has some kind of guacamole governing board certified me as an aficionado? Do I know if guacamole really is better suited for certain parts of the year? Do I even know what the hell I’m talking about?
The answer, of course, is no.
But the way I see things, if baseball can have a season, if “Desperate Housewives” can have a season, if a theatre company can have a season, and if whales can have a breeding season, then why can’t I have my own season?
And so I choose guacamole.
To start off the 2008 season, I targeted a scheduled night of garage poker this past Monday. At an emotional level, I had been treating my debut outing as if this were baseball’s spring training, looking at the exercise simply as a way to “clear the cobwebs,” or “to stretch the legs.” The poker dads, after all, would be coming for the cards and male-bonding, not for guacamole, so I felt safe. As the hour neared, I was slicing and dicing and mixing and seasoning, having a good old time, mindful of the warm weather, of the cold bottle of Modelo at my side.
When the poker dads showed, I didn’t say much. I just paid silent attention to the two small bowls of guacamole and smiled to myself as they were quickly exhausted.
Adding to my glee, the next day, a friend and I visited a newly found Mexican-food joint, where I had a phenomenal chile-relleno experience.
[Long sigh if contentment] I love guacamole season. I guess it’s because that, along with the great food, guacamole season means fun, laughs, cold Mexican beer, friends and family, warm weather, sunny skies and Latin jazz.
And who could possibly have a problem with that?
Postscript: Several of you have asked repeatedly for my recipe. I’m afraid that, even in today’s open-source world, I’m still not ready to share it. Maybe later in the season I will share it, or maybe I never will. But I will offer a tip: You are doing your guacamole a disservice when you pair it with a mass-produced, paper-thin chip. Authenticity, my friends. Authenticity.
March 23, 2008 at 7:58 am
Other than guacamole, what is the next food thing that you like? I’ll bet I’ve made it and I will share a killer recipe for it – but P AAA L EEE A S E tell us how to make killer/all-time-great/All Star/California/Mexican/SF-USA/thee-best GUOC ! ??
Bow-ing in homage —>
Paul – Sorrento, FL USA
March 24, 2008 at 12:43 am
I understand your position. … The universe has been looking out for me, so the least I could do is share my guacamole with the universe. I’m thinking I need to share my guacamole secrets with the world later this 2008 season. Hell, let’s decide on a date. How does August 1, 2008 sound? …. I will admit this; I take a slightly free-style approach to my guacamole preparation; I adjust with the avocados, with the other ingredients, so this recipe will not be rigid. This won’t be a matter of following simple directions regarding a tablespoon of this and a teaspoon of that. You will be asked to drink Mexican beer, or a Jarritos, as you prepare the guacamole. You will be asked to on embark your guacamole journey with music. You will be asked to possibly adjust your attitude. … Much more to come on August 1.
Oh, and I love
March 24, 2008 at 2:03 pm
Yes! I will now look forward to guacamole season with the same glee that I have for the Fourth of July and Thanksgiving! So like all good open source: will the “community” have to submit revisions back so that all can benefit?