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Greg Bardsley

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minutiae

Some kind of inspiration

3amNot too long ago, I saw a guy walk past my desk eating something on a stick.

It looked like it had little legs, that thing on a stick.

It jarred me.

I soon realized it was just a corn dog, but it gave me a great idea for a short story. Well, that and the troubling reality of acronym-inflation.

Add an interesting item from my son’s recently acquired book on Northern California insects, and I had some of the primary elements of my new short story, “Some Kind of Rugged Genius,” which now appears in 3:AM Magazine.

Of course, if roasted rat on a stick, California stink beetles and acronym insanity ain’t your thing, you may wanna pass on this one.

Minutiae Monday — “pea gravel and Yellow Medicine”

Minutiae for your Monday …

My copy of Anthony Neil Smith’s “Yellow Medicine” finally arrived, and I’m loving it. If great writing, original characters and compelling crime stories are your thing, I encourage you to participate today in Smith’s “Pyschobilly Monday” campaign by buying your copy of Yellow Medicine through Barnes & Noble. … When the writing is good, it can make just about anything interesting. Case in point: the landscape-design blog, A Verdant Life, authored by TV prima donna and poker buddy John Black. I’m not a landscape-design enthusiast (nor am I hater), but there’s something about interesting ideas and great writing that can hold my attention, even when the subject matter is pea gravel. It’s pleasing to watch someone do their thing really well. So be sure to check out A Verdant Life, which currently features John handing me my ass in the matter of “do-it-yourselfism.” … For one of two Mother’s Day appetizers tonight, I whipped up perhaps my strongest batch of guacamole of this young season. This came as a major relief, as my last two batches of guacamole had been substantially sub-par. Be sure to tune in on Aug. 1 when I open-source my recipe. … My feet hurt from some serious Mother’s Day facilitation, but it was a great day. … Last night my wife took me to a great jazz-and-dinner joint located through a side alley in San Francisco. … It feels good to be working on a novel again. … Who else digs A&E’s extremely well-produced reality program, “The First 48 Hours”?

Minutiae Monday — “Unwanted views of my mid-section”

Let’s dive right in with this week’s serving of minutiae:

One of my son’s teammates in T-ball likes to take a load off atop of third base, where he proceeds to pour handfuls of dirt over his legs until his dad hollers for him to stand-up. … Watching my 3-year-old fly down a steep hill on his Razor scooter brings my stomach to the base of my throat. … The master-bathroom mirror in our rental house must have been made for very small people, which explains why all I see of myself are some very unwanted views of my mid-section (can’t even see my shoulders) … I have to admit: I do like fried rice. … One mommy + one daddy + two boys + one queen bed + 5 in the morning = Daddy taking his pillow and stumbling to the couch. … Sunglasses keep breaking on me. I’m like the Bermuda Triangle of sunglasses. … I’ve entered a period in which people from my college days are contacting me. … The same unopened can of “Pork with Natural Juices” has been with me at every job I’ve had since I graduated from college in ’91 (as a reporter, I used to cover “government pork”; plus, I love pork and lard humor). I plan to open it when I retire. … At dusk last night I dug up and replanted a hydrangea.

Minutiae Monday

What was I thinking? Of course my minutiae posts are better suited for Mondays, not Wednesdays.

“Minutiae Monday” sounds so much better.

So here goes my minutiae as I see it at the end of a long weekend:

My son Dylan, 3, is so thrilled to wear clothes that weren’t previously worn by his 6-year-old brother, Jack. Two of his favorites are the recently purchased basketball outfits, “Hotshots 52” and “Superstar 39.” Whenever Jack pulls out a basketball, Dylan whips around and mumbles to himself as he runs to his bedroom, “I get my Hotshots 52.” … Few things match the energy of 9 first-grade boys gathering for two hours of birthday-party dodgeball and basketball (today) … I made my second batch of guacamole of the season tonight, and my wife said, “Too salty.” … It was physically painful to write my property-tax check tonight … By pure chance, I helped eight boys with their costumes for the musical, “Snow Biz,” at Jack’s school on Friday — pure mayhem. … I got all dandied up on Saturday for a fancy tea experience with my wife for her birthday, followed by something called a “sage and lemon pedicure” and foot massage (for her, not me) and a phenomenal Greek meal in Palo Alto. … Tonight my wife and I had a What-the-F-are-we-doing? attack regarding our soon-to-commence house add-on, family-move-out, Greg-and-Nancy-assume-more-fixed costs commitment. … I might be a jurist for a murder trial. … Facebook has sent several emails detailing very flattering rankings involving “Greg Bardsley” and an elite group of others. Then I realized those flattering rankings were for another Greg Bardsley, some FB friend of mine living New Zealand. … My mom would like me to come up to San Francisco to move a bunch of roses she just bought. … When the boys and I began to play air-guitar to classic Boston songs tonight, Nancy gave us her I’ll-see-you-guys-later look and slipped out of the kitchen. … The Sun Microsystems “March Madness” basketball tournament in Menlo Park is anyone’s to win. … I still have zero interest in owning a giant flat-panel TV. I. Just. Don’t. Care. … I’m planning to write an entirely different kind of novel this next time around. … God, I love my new MacBook.

Introducing, “Minutiae Wednesday”

On other days, I might use this space to tackle lofty topics like “Eat Pray Love” and the 2008 Greg Bardsley Guacamole Season. But on Wednesdays, I think I’ll dive into the minutiae of life. This is, after all, a blog.

Here’s the minutiae as I saw it last night around 11:30 …..

“I’m currently wearing dark-blue sweats with double white stripes on the side. … My wife says she’s determined to beat me in some kind of hit-count battle between our blogs. …. I’m wondering how this one family down the street can afford to spend so much money. … Last night I stayed up way too late writing … I had to give my oldest child several time-outs tonight, and forever take away two of his toys. … I called another man “a jerk” today … Yesterday, I received my first-ever payment for fiction. … Our dishwasher broke again, and it will be weeks before the replacement part arrives. … Tonight I ghostwrote a letter for my sister, who is demanding that the guy who committed a hit-and-run against her pay to have the back bumper of her VW Bug dipped in chrome. … I took the garbage out to the curb tonight. … I like Debra Messing’s hairline. … I love the way my wife laughs. … Both our boys fell asleep by 8:38 tonight (so nice!). … When driving, I am forced to wear the most insane pair of volleyball sunglasses. … We’ll have to move out within a month so our contractor can get started with our add-on project. … I got a story accepted for STORYGLOSSIA‘s noir edition. …Tonight, my wife and I got a real kick out of Brett Michael’s “Rock of Love” reality program (great editing). … I’ve been listening to “fast-paced spy music” the past 24 hours. … I’m thinking, This list could go on forever. … Cutting off the minutiae — for now.”

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